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random quotes, thoughts, words of wisdom, etc.. :)

Forgiveness is your greatest teacher.

Forgiveness is a difficult area for most of us. We all need to do forgiveness work. Anyone who has a problem with loving themselves is stuck in this area. Forgiveness opens our hearts to self-love.

Many of us carry grudges for years and years. We feel self-righteous because of what someone else did to us. I call this being stuck in the prison of self-righteous resentment. We get to be right. We never get to be happy.

I can hear you saying, “But you don’t know what they did to me; it’s unforgivable.” Being unwilling to forgive is a terrible thing to do to ourselves. Bitterness is like swallowing a teaspoon of poison every day. It accumulates and harms us. It’s impossible to be healthy and free when we keep ourselves bound to the past. The incident is long gone and over with. Yes, it’s true that they didn’t behave well. However, it’s over. Sometimes we feel that if we forgive them, then we’re saying that what they did to us was okay.

One of our biggest spiritual lessons is to understand that everyone is doing the best they can at any given moment. People can only do so much with the understanding, awareness, and knowledge that they have. Invariably, anyone who mistreats someone was mistreated themselves as a child. The greater the level of violence, the greater their own inner pain, and the more they may lash out. This is not to say that their behavior is acceptable or excusable. However, for our own spiritual growth, we must be aware of their pain.

The incident is over. Perhaps long over. Let it go. Allow yourself to be free. Come out of prison and step into the sunshine of life. If the incident is still going on, then ask yourself why you think so little of yourself that you still put up with it. Why do you stay in such a situation?

Raise your self-esteem to such a level that you only allow loving experiences in your life. Don’t waste time trying to “get even.” It doesn’t work. What we give out always comes back to us. So let’s drop the past and work on loving ourselves in the now. Then we will have a wonderful future.

The person who is hardest to forgive is the one who can teach you the greatest lessons. When you love yourself enough to rise above the old situation, then understanding and forgiveness will be easy. And you’ll be free.

I’d like to suggest that you do some mirror work on forgiveness. Look into your eyes in the mirror and say with feeling, I am willing to forgive! Repeat this several times. What are you feeling? Do you feel stubborn and stuck, or do you feel open and willing?

Just notice your feelings. Don’t judge them. Breathe deeply a few times, and repeat the process. Does it feel any different?

An interesting phenomenon is that when we do our own forgiveness work, other people often respond to it. It’s not necessary to go to the person involved and tell them that you forgive them. Sometimes you’ll want to do this, but you don’t have to. The major work in forgiveness is done in your own heart.

Forgiveness is seldom for “them.” It’s for us.

I’ve heard from many people who have truly forgiven someone, and then a month or two later, they may receive a phone call or a letter from the other person, asking to be forgiven. This seems to be particularly true when forgiveness exercises are done in front of the mirror, so as you do this exercise notice how deep your feelings might be.

 

Louise L. Hay

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There are things that can never be settled.

There are things that can never be settled. Sometimes, sorry is not enough. It’s better for two people to forget and be strangers. Thus, time becomes your second “sorry”. When you cross path to that person again, maybe by then, smiling wouldn’t be so hard to do.

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When you hold resentment toward another…

When you hold resentment toward another, you are bound to that person or condition by an emotional link that is stronger than steel. Forgiveness is the only way to dissolve that link and get free.
~ Catherine Ponder

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Sometimes the one we thought was…

Sometimes the one we thought was our worst enemy in the past
ends up being our best support in the future.
Time to forgive and move on in one another in praise and life.

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Forgiveness is a sign of strength…

Forgiveness is a sign of strength and can unleash powerful energies we expend now for anger or other destructive things. Above all, it’s about to forgive yourself. The more I have realize that I can only forgive other people really, and sooner I start to be consistent with what exists within me and around me.

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May all beings have forgiveness in their hearts!

May I have forgiveness in my heart for anything I think I’ve done wrong.

May I forgive myself for what I think were all my past omissions and commissions. They are long gone. I understand that I was a different person then and this one is forgiving the one that I was. May I feel the forgiveness filling me and enveloping me with a sense of warmth and ease.

May I forgive my parents for anything I have ever blamed them for. May I understand that they, too, are different now. May this forgiveness fill them and surround them, and may I know in my heart that this is my most wonderful way of togetherness.

May I forgive my nearest and dearest people for anything that I think they have done wrong or are doing wrong at this time. May they feel that I accept them. May that forgiveness fill them, realizing that this is my expression of love. May I forgive my friends for anything I have disliked about them. May my forgiveness reach out to them so that they can be filled with it and embraced by it.

May I forgive the people I know, whoever they might be, for whatever it is that I have blamed them for, for what I have judged them for, or for what I have disliked. May my forgiveness fill their hearts, and surround and envelope them with it, and let it be my expression of love for them.

May I forgive fully any special person towards whom I still have resentment, rejection, or dislike. May I remember that everyone is suffering. May this forgiveness come from my heart and reach out to that person completely and totally. May I forgive any one person, or any situation, or any group of people, whom I am condemning, blaming, or disliking. May my forgiveness be my expression of unconditional love. They may not do what I think are the right things.

May I remember that all human beings are suffering and that my heart needs forgiveness in order to have purity of love. May I look again and see whether there’s still anyone or anything anywhere in the world that I blame or condemn. May I forgive them so that there is no separation in my heart.

May I put my attention back on myself and recognize the goodness in me and the effort I am making. May I feel the warmth and ease that comes from my forgiveness. May all beings have forgiveness in their hearts!

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Can we talk about forgiving? Why is it so hard to do?

Can we talk about forgiving? Why is it so hard to do?

Forgiveness is a misunderstood notion. When I discuss forgiveness with my clients, there is usually a load of resistance and a need to express to me how I must not REALLY understand what happened or I would be recommending they beat the crap out of the offender, NOT forgive them! Trust me, forgiveness is for “us” not necessarily for “them”.

1. Commit to letting go.

You aren’t going to do it in a second or maybe not even in a day. It can take time to get over something. So commit to changing, because you recognize that the pain is hurting you.

2. Think about the pros and cons.

What problems does this pain cause you? Does it cause you unhappiness? Think of the benefits of forgiveness — how it will make you happier, free you from the past and the pain, improve things with your relationships and life in general.

3. Realize you have a choice.

You cannot control the actions of others, and shouldn’t try. But you can control not only your actions, but also your thoughts. You can stop reliving the hurt, and can choose to move on. You have this power.

4. Empathize.

Try this: put yourself in that person’s shoes. Try to understand why the person did what he did. Start from the assumption that the person isn’t a bad person, but just did something wrong.

5. Understand your responsibility.

Try to figure out how you could have been partially responsible for what happened. What could you have done to prevent it, and how can you prevent it from happening next time? This isn’t to say you’re taking all the blame, or taking responsibility away from the other person, but to realize that we are not victims but participants in life.

6. Focus on the present.

Now that you’ve reflected on the past, realize that the past is over. It isn’t happening anymore, except in your mind. And that causes problems — unhappiness and stress. Instead, bring your focus back to the present moment. What joy can you find in what is happening right now?

7. Allow peace to enter your life.

As you focus on the present, try focusing on your breathing. Imagine each breath going out is the pain and the past, being released from your body and mind. And imagine each breath coming in is peace, entering you and filling you up. Release the pain and the past. Let peace enter your life. And go forward, thinking no longer of the past, but of peace and the present.

8. Feel compassion.

Finally, forgive the person and realize that in forgiveness, you are allowing yourself to be happy and move on.
Being healthy is not always easy but always worth the effort.

By Eric Allen Bell

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To forgive is the highest, most beautiful form of love.

To forgive is the highest, most beautiful form of love.
In return, you will receive untold peace and happiness.

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The stupid neither forgive nor forget.

The stupid neither forgive nor forget.
The naive forgive and forget.
The wise forgive but do not forget.

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I don’t forgive people because I’m weak.

I don’t forgive people because I’m weak.
I forgive them because I’m strong enough to understand that everyone makes mistakes.

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